what is a lie?

According to Wikipedia, the free on-line encyclopedia, a lie (also called prevarication, falsehood) is a type of deception in the form of an untruthful statement, especially with the intention to deceive others.  To lie is to state something with disregard to the truth with the intention that people will accept the statement as truth. 

The other day at happy hour, I was having a conversation with one of my girls...about lying.  We were trying to categorize what a lie is.  She said a lie is when you purposely do not tell the truth.  I agreed with her.  I then added that I thought lying was also when you do not answer questions at all or purposely leave pieces out.  You know- when people avoid the question entirely and change the subject or when you ask a double wammy question and the person only answers one part on purpose.

So at that very moment, at luck would have it, a living breathing example of a lie appeared.  I found out a guy I had been crushing on actually had a girlfriend.  Here's how it went down.  Picture this we are at happy hour and we are talking about a book my girlfriend just read that I am now reading, called A Belle In Brooklyn. {Sidear: if you haven’t read it, please grab a copy, its good!!!) Anyway the book describes the authors’ adventures and rules for living the single life. 

So anyway we are all at happy hour sitting at the bar -glancing at the book- me, some friends and my crush.  Now I definitely know when I met him, he didn’t have a girl-and in all honestly I didn’t want to be his girl (at that point).  So we are talking about the book and the single life and I am sure that we all fall victim to the he didn’t answer my question situation so pay attention. He says “the book is about the single life? I’m not reading that.” My girl says, “it’s  a good book…well...are you single?”  A pregnant pause happens here, the subject changes and he orders a drink. WTF!!   In that very instance I said “see, he just lied to us.  Weren’t we just talking about lies.”  My girl, who is a very good listener, says “oh no he said he didn’t have a girl, he was single.”  I pointed out “no, he didn’t answer the question”.   She says “no he said he was single.”  I call him over and repeat the question, he looks at me, as she says “didn’t you say you were single.”  He says “no, you’re right I didn’t answer the question.”   I reiterated the point and that’s when he said, “yeah you right I didn’t answer.”  Finally he mumbles something that sounded like he said “I’m not single.”

He never told me. 

He didn’t answer the question until I pointed it out.


He lied to me. 

I’m not calling him a liar, but….if the bow tie fits…A liar is a person who is lying, who has previously lied, or who tends by nature to lie repeatedly—even when not necessary.  Lying is typically used to refer to deceptions in oral or written communication. Other forms of deception, such as disguises or forgeries, are generally not considered lies, though the underlying intent may be the same.Serious lies (such as perjury, fraud, and defamation) are punishable by law.

Men who lie about their relationship status in my humble opinion should be punished by law.  Unfortunately and fortunately there are enough women that they can tell the truth about their relationship status and they will still get what they want from them.  Why lie?